


What Do You Mean?

by glitterandtears6



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Cute Dan Howell/Phil Lester, Dan Howell/Phil Lester in Love, Domestic Dan Howell/Phil Lester, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Romance, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-09-15
Packaged: 2020-10-19 07:10:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20653202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glitterandtears6/pseuds/glitterandtears6
Summary: Phil has started saying "I love you" each night to Dan before he goes to bed.





	What Do You Mean?

“Love you,” Phil called down the hallway as he closed his bedroom door.

Dan blushed, out of sight from Phil. “Love you, too,” he muttered. 

Three days ago, Phil had started saying “love you” every night before he went to bed. It had slipped in so casually, Dan wasn’t even sure Phil knew he was doing it. It made sense, at least to some degree. They were basically family after living together for ten years. 

Dan lay awake in bed that night, as he had every night since Phil started saying it. He stared at the ceiling, doubting himself and then doubting his doubts and, eventually, falling into a horrible loop. Luckily, he was tired tonight, so he eventually fell asleep despite his busy brain. 

As soon as he heard Dan close his door, Phil peeked back out into the hall again. He stared at the closed door, heart pounding. He didn’t know what he felt, and in all honesty, those words hadn’t meant to come out of his mouth that first night. It just felt right, though, so he kept it going. When he lied back down in his bed, his mind raced with confusion and anxiety.

The next morning, Dan and Phil were both tired for the same reasons, but neither knew that. Dan sat down at the table and ate his bowl of cereal in silence while Phil turned on the TV. 

“So, plans today?” Phil asked when he sat down across from Dan. 

Dan shrugged. “Editing. Not much else.”

Phil nodded. 

Two hours later, they were doing just that. Dan sat in front of the computer in his room while Phil kept him company from the bed. They stayed that way until lunch time, and then came back after lunch to do more of the same. By evening, they had both forgotten all about the awkward new nighttime ritual. That is, until it was actually bedtime.

Phil walked down the hallway towards his room, but froze in his tracks when he remembered this time last night. He snuck a glance behind him, where Dan was turning off the TV and rising from the couch. He panicked and blurted out, “Goodnight, love you,” before dashing into his room. 

Dan sighed and mumbled, “I love you, too.” And he did love Phil, it just felt odd to say it out loud. He felt his mind start to spiral again as he crawled into bed. He wondered why Phil had said it. He tried to tell himself it meant nothing, but he couldn’t. He tried to believe it meant something, but he couldn’t manage that either. After twenty minutes of this, he climbed out of his bed, restless. He wasn’t sure what he was doing, but he found himself walking towards Phil’s room. “Nope,” he whispered, but he kept walking. 

“Dan?” Phil grunted when his room was flooded with light. 

“Yeah, uh, hi.”

Phil sat up. “What is it?”

Dan wasn’t sure what to say. He sat down on the edge of Phil’s bed. “Can we talk?”

“Of course.” Phil switched on the lamp by his bed and crawled to sit next to Dan. He stared at him expectantly.

“Um, I just…” Dan fidgeted with his fingers. 

“Is this about the…?” 

Dan looked up at Phil and nodded cautiously.

“I shouldn’t have said it, I’m sorry. You’re probably uncomfortable now.”

Dan lowered his eyebrows. “No, no, it’s not that. I just don’t really know how I feel. I guess I was wondering, what do you mean by it?”

Phil tilted his head.

“Like, I don’t know… What do you mean by it?”

“I- I’m not sure. I’m sorry. What do you think it should mean?” Phil spoke barely above a whisper.

Dan chuckled. “That’s an awful lot of pressure on me.”

Phil smiled and grabbed Dan’s hands. “Look, we’ve been best friends for ten years. Of course I love you. That can mean whatever you want it to mean.”

Dan could feel his palms sweating in Phil’s grip. What he wanted was starting to become clearer to him, but he could never say it out loud. He slipped his hands away and stood. “Sorry for bothering you.” 

“Wait, Dan!” Phil’s voice broke in worry. 

“I shouldn’t have- Of course you- I don’t know what I expected. I’m- I’m sorry.” Dan was starting to cry.

Phil shot up from the bed and found Dan’s wrist before he could run. “Hey.”

“What? I said I’m sorry, I don’t know… I don’t…”

Phil pulled Dan into a tight hug, settling his head into his shoulder. “It’s okay. It’s all okay.” He let go after a while, staring into Dan’s puffy eyes. “What do you want it to mean, Dan?”

Dan was blushing and avoiding eye contact. “I don’t-”

“Dan.” Phil cupped Dan’s jaw with his hands. “Yeah?”

“Y- yeah.” Dan felt like his heart could explode as Phil leaned forward and connected their lips. As soon as Phil pulled away, Dan found himself crying harder.

“What’s wrong?” 

Dan chuckled through his sobs. “I love you, Phil.”

Phil grinned. “I love you too.” 

They stood staring at each other for what felt like ages before Dan broke the silence. “Um, it’s getting kind of late, so I guess I’ll head to bed now.”

Silently, Phil linked his fingers between Dan’s and led him to the bed behind them. Dan was grinning as Phil pulled him under the covers. He curled up next to Phil and laid his head on his shoulder.

“G’night,” Phil whispered into Dan’s hair before planting a kiss on his head.

“Good night,” Dan replied.


End file.
